"Mindfulness and Meditation allow us to open our hearts, relax our bodies, and clear our minds enough to experience the vast, mysterious, sacred reality of life directly. With Practice we come to know for ourselves that eternity is available in each moment.

Your MMM Courtesy Wake Up Call:
Musings on Life and Practice
by a Longtime Student of Meditation

Saturday, March 16, 2024

Silence is Golden

 

 “Be still.  Stillness reveals the secrets of eternity. 
When there is silence one finds the anchor of the universe within oneself” 
― Lao Tzu

 "Never miss a good chance to shut up."

― Will Rogers

Sometimes the magic happens when you are sitting alone in silence.  The thin veil dissolves. The Connection is made.  

Sometimes the magic happens when you are meditating with others.  In the silence, the illusion of our fundamental separateness evaporates.   The "I" becomes "we" -- and we know it.

I think it's even sweeter when it happens that way.

I remember one of those times distinctly.  Sitting here now, it seems like it happened in a different world, a long, long time ago.  I guess it was.  The year was 6 B.C.  Six years Before COVID. 

There were fifteen of us gathered to Simply Sit Still during the Wednesday Evening Mindfulness Circle at the Recovery Learning Community's Greenfield Center that night.  As was our Practice, I rang the bell three times and we sat in silent meditation for twenty minutes.

At a certain point, it happened.  It got really quiet.  Really, Really -- Quiet

In the silence,  a Presence emerged.

When I rang the bell to end the meditation and begin the Heart Council, the air was electric.  I knew that what I had just experienced wasn't just a subjective personal event occurring within the confines of my own skull.  I could see it in people's eyes.  

As we went around the Circle to compare notes on what we had each experienced during our meditation, the first person exclaimed, wide-eyed, "you could actually hear the silence!" 

"Yes.  The Silence was deafening!" a second added.  Others nodded.  

The magic had occurred.  In the silence, what my first Zen teacher called the Soundless Sound had emerged as a shared experience.   Whenever that happens, even for a  few moments, our Essential Oneness within the embrace of the One Love becomes less theoretical.   Reality Asserts Itself.  You can feel it in your bones.  In the stillness our shared silence, we know:

                             We are not only in this together -- we are this together!

I love it when that happens.

And yet...

Scurrying Through the Matrix

In a society that places a high value on individualism, competition, speed, achievement,  and acquisition, Simply Sitting Still can be challenging.  We have been conditioned to experience our world through mental and emotional states that manifest a lot of mental activity, a feeling of restless motion -- and, whether we are aware of it or not,  a profound sense of separation 

As the profit motive and the technology of late stage capitalism increasingly captures and commodifies our attention, it's only gotten worse.  With the proliferation of cellphones and video screens, We are bombarded with incessant visual and auditory stimulation.  Our minds are habitually filled with incessant noise and chatter -- inner and outer.  

In today's world, most of us have spent much of our lives being constantly distracted and disconnected from our True Nature. 

The direct experience of what Thich Nhat Hanh calls Interbeing, our fundamental interconnection with one another and the entire Web of Life , is rarely encountered on a conscious level.  Yet it is always there -- always here, more correctly -- in the embrace of what contemporary spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle and others have called the Eternal Now.
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Monday, February 19, 2024

One Love. One Heart

“In Chinese, the word for heart and mind is the same -- Hsin.
 For when the heart is open and the mind is clear 
they are of one substance, of one essence.” 

"Love is not what we become but who we already are."
-- Stephen Levine

I slept in this morning for the first time in quite awhile.  

Although I did awaken at around 4:30, to participate in my "wee hours" recycling project, I immediately returned to bed.  There, I followed my breathing into "dozing/dreaming meditation." 
 
A long, rather vivid, dream quickly emerged.  It was unsettling.  
 
With echoes of my many "personal failures" ringing through my mind, I awoke again.  I glanced at the clock.  It read 6:45! That's wicked late in my world.  
 
Yikes!

Feeling harried and hurried, I went into the bathroom to do a bit more recycling.  Then I picked up the iPhone and cast my Lojong Slogan for the day: Number 49. "Always meditate on the difficult emotions that emerge."

That sounded spot on.
 
I could feel a deep sadness welling in my chest  -- but, damn,  it was LATE!  The hiss of the morning traffic on High Street concurred.  It was rush hour.  I had a long list of things to do.  I felt propelled to just keep moving! 
 
Day In. Day Out.

For decades now, I've begun my day with an hour of meditation. The commitment to a daily practice made sense to me.  The momentum of this commitment has become a habit. It carries me along.  At times, I feel like an autumn leaf floating on the surface of a dancing brook heading toward the sea. 
 
This commitment seems natural to me. Through repetition, certain mind states and behaviors have become habits. At this point, the Practice is doing me as much as I'm doing it.  Life flows on.  I flow on.  
 
During the day, in the midst of the things to be done, I'm reminded to be mindful every twenty minutes with the peal of a meditation bell on my iPnone.  I also have an old three minute egg timer that catches my eye now and then.  I flip it over and Simply Sit Still.  Aware of my breath and body, the sights and sounds surrounding me at the moment, and the gracious spaciousness and stillness that appears to permeate each present moment, I hit the reset button.
 
Then, as the twilight fades into night, I often watch an hour or two of media. Then, an inveterate bookworm, I pick up a book.  These readings run the gamut from the scriptures and commentaries from the world's religions, to contemporary works in history, philosophy, psychology, neuroscience, and physics.  The book usually joins me in bed for a bit.
 
Then I meditate in shavasana for awhile, before turning on my side and meditating into sleep.  I wake up in the wee hours to pee, practice a dreamy, dozy, death meditation in shavasana and fall back into the arms of sleep.  At times, the Dream Yoga Practice produces an awe-inspiring lucid dream.  (The flying dreams are the most fun.) 
 
More often, more mundane concerns appear in my dreams.   When I awaken, within a dream or afterwards, I practice opening and embracing even the more frightening, frustrating, and painful assortment of energies that may emerge. 
 
Then, at about 5:30, I wake up. I brush my teeth.   I cast a Lojong Slogan for the day. Then, after a few moments of prayers, prostrations, and bows, I Simply Sit Still.

That bedrock morning ritual became a bit rocky this past week, though.  
 
To Sit or Not to Sit?

I actually missed a morning meditation one day last week for the first time in a long, long time.  Then the next day, I only sat for 20 minutes before setting up to host the Morning Mindfulness Meditation Circle on Zoom. There, thankfully, I did have the opportunity to Just Sit Still for another 20 minutes, and practice mindful movement for another 10 minutes before beginning the sharing session we call the Heart Council.  Then I was ready to launch into a busy day.
 
So. What's the big deal about establishing a daily meditation practice?

For sure, most of the meditation teachers I've practiced with recommended it.  It seem logical that our minds, like our bodies can be trained to experience a healthier relationship to life.  
I'd been an athlete in high school and college.  I'd seen the positive results of devoting time and effort to physical training.  Yet, beyond the medals and trophies I acquired, I also sensed that there was much more to life.  My heart led the way to explore the deeper meaning, purpose, and possibilities of our journey.
 
With the recent advances in neuroscience it is clear that our minds, even the biological component of the brain and nervous system can be changed to operate with greater concentration and clarity through mindfulness training. 
 
Most every morning, I don't think about it. I just do it.

Yet, this morning, that didn't happen. I woke up late and was off and running!  Having jumped into a number of new volunteer projects, I had things to do! I grabbed a cup of coffee and sat down in front of the computer, ready to tackle the first thing on the list.  
 
Then, I came to my senses.  I looked at the sunlight playing through the bare branches of the trees outside the window.
 
I stopped.  
 
I sat up a bit straighter and took a long, slow, deep breath.   Sitting there, I relaxed and sensed that place in me that appears to make choices.   Rather than just "go with the flow"this morning, I had to stand in the way of my own momentum.  A real decision had to be made.  
 
After a few more conscious breaths,  it became clear to me.  First things, first.  The list will be there when I return.  I stood up and headed back to in the bedroom.  I faced the altar.  Although the preliminary ritual has transformed over the years, I set a timer for an hour.  Then, as I have done for a long time,  I Simply Sat Still.
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Monday, January 15, 2024

Mindfulness and Mission

 

“I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love
will have the final word in reality... Man must evolve for all conflict 
a method that rejects revenge, aggression, and retaliation.  
The foundation of such a method is love.” 
-- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

“When we are mindful, deeply in touch with the present moment,
our understanding of what is going on deepens, and we begin to be
filled with acceptance, joy, peace and love.”
― Thích Nhất Hạnh



I awoke this morning stiff and sore, a bit out of sorts.  The holiday season, with it's ghosts of Christmas past, health concerns, and other challenges among family and friends, was long, difficult, and demanding.


Although my energy had returned after a couple of months of wending my way through COVID, my 77 year old body, with its failing eyesight, bevy of inflammations, dental difficulties, achy joints and the resultant doctor's appointments, still needs a lot of maintenance time and attention.

As I plodded slowly toward the bathroom,  the whole world -- inner and outer -- seemed shrouded in gray tones of doom and gloom. 
 
Images of my inevitable, if not imminent, demise floated through my mind as I limped along.  Through the wonders of modern medical science, I've already beat the genetic odds of my lineage. My dad was dead at 61.  His dad was gone at 57.  I've got two stents in my heart forestalling the day when this aging body gives it up to the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come.
 
There were times in my life that beginning the day in this frame of mind on a frigid winter morning would have thrown me for a loop.  A dark mood and dark thoughts would have wrapped themselves around one another and held onto one another tightly -- sometimes for hours, sometimes for days.  Sometimes for weeks at a time.  

In fact, there were times in my life that I had spiraled down into deep depression, anxiety, and total burn-out.

That was then.  This is now.

This morning, like most mornings these days, I brushed my teeth, washed my face. took a deep breath, and felt my heart. Then, with compassion and curiosity, I looked my mirror image straight in the eye for a moment or two.  Then, I wobbled over to the altar in my bedroom.  There, I spent a few moments in a sequence of ritual prayers and bows.  Then, as I've done for decades, I bowed, lowered myself to the zafu and Simply Sat Still. 

Within moments, it was different.

There in my little corner of the world, with my body comfortable and upright on the meditation cushion, with eyes open and unfocused, I floated on the breath of Practice.  In the expansive gaze of Open Awareness, I relaxed and watched as ripples of thought, feelings, and bodily sensations emerged and dissipated along the surface of a clear, calm, vast pool of bright spacious awareness.  Simply Sitting Still, no longer grasping or pushing away what I was experiencing, I breathed, relaxed, softened, and opened.  

Almost immediately, my heart and mind opened to the fact that a lot of old coots were feeling these same aches and pains and sadness.  Deeply aware that bodily pain and the emotional clouds of doom and gloom are being experienced by countless other human beings, young and old, at that very moment, I relaxed and opened to our pain. 

As I have learned to do in Tonglen Practice, I simply allowed painful bodily sensations and emotional energies to emerge and breathed them directly into my heart chakra.  There, in my heart of hearts, the gracious spaciousness of the One Love that exists within and beyond all that is embraced my sincere aspirations for our collective freedom from suffering.  In the Compassionate Presence that emerged, the dark ripples of painful energy began to dissipate and dissolve.  I stayed with it.  Soon, with each out breath, I was able to release my heartfelt aspirations as prayers for peace, liberation, and healing. 

Over the years, I've found that sometimes tears will emerge as I practice Tonglen.  I've learned to trust in the tears. They are actually a good thing.  It is the body's natural response to the grief that is inherent in the human condition.  Released, the tears wash away the hardness of heart that we've been taught to wear as a shield against the painful aspects of life.  As tears flow, the heart opens.  Sometimes gratitude, even joyous wonder, emerge as well.  Love embraces it all.

At other times, when facing strong emotional energies, I've found that it's been wise to "back off" a bit.  It can be overwhelming at times.  Having been touched by the teachings of Pema Chodron, I've found that being gentle and patient with oneself is, perhaps, the most important quality of heart to bring to Practice.  If need be, I'll focus my attention elsewhere for awhile.  I'll zero in on the sights and sounds of the space I'm in, or a return to a tighter focus on my breath.  Sometimes, I will turn to a mantra, metta recitations, or prayer.  Sometimes, it's been time to just let go and take a walk. 

Yet, this morning, I simply sat still breathing. Tonglen Practice emerged and, after a time, receded. Then I Simply Sat Still in open awareness again. Time danced with the Timeless, as the sounds of traffic ebbed and flowed outside the window.  

The hour flew by.  The bells on my iPhone rang.  I recited the Four Bodhisattva Vows as I have done for decades -- and rose to face the day.

But, that was then, this is now.  

Here I am, sitting at this old Mac Laptop watching letters and words tap dance across the screen.  Remembering to take a couple of deep breaths, I feel my heart and sit up a bit straighter. I relax and come to my senses.   Settling into a fuller awareness of the sights and sounds and sensations and gracious spaciousness of Life as it emerges moment to moment, I relax and open.  Words seem to just appear and find their way into my fingers.  It's quite mysterious really. Being present, I feel a Presence. In the midst of a wondrous, somewhat dreamlike beauty, Reality asserts itself. The sacred and the ordinary dance hand in hand.

So, now what?

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Saturday, December 30, 2023

Promises. Promises.

Each of you is perfect the way you are ... and you can use a little improvement.”
Suzuki Rosh

“Daily sitting is our bread and butter, the basic stuff of dharma. 
Without it we tend to be confused.”
Charlotte Joko Beck


Back in the day, there were quite a few of us that were drawn to Zen because of its seemingly irreverent and iconoclastic tenor and tone.  

To a bunch of 1960's hippies, peaceniks, and radicals, the traditional tales of zen monks seemed "right on!"
 
Those dudes were kicking over water jugs, writing poems lauding drunkeness, unabashedly proclaiming that Buddha was a "shit stick", raising all sorts of hell.  Those Zennies were our kind of people.

Little did I know...

Once I actually connected with a teacher and a sangha, a different reality emerged.  I found that the foundation of Zen Buddhism, like that of other spiritual traditions throughout the world, rests squarely on a set of rules.  Rather than becoming a member of another tribe of free form hippies, Zen training meant making a personal commitment to a teacher, and observing a clear set of vows and precepts.  
 
When I ordained with Thich Nhat Hanh's Tien Hiep Order, there were the Three Jewels and the 5 Mindfulness Trainings as preliminaries.  Then we received the 14 Training vows of the Order.  In the White Plum Sanghas I practiced with, I was faced with Taking Refuge in the Triple Gems, the Four Bodhisattva Vows, the Three Pure Precepts, and the 10 Essential Precepts. .

WTF?  

Jeez.  Growing up I only had to worry about the Ten Commandments! Now? This was somewhere near twice as many rules.  So much for "doing your own thing!"

Or so it seemed. 
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