"Listening is a very deep practice.You have to empty yourself.
You have
to leave space in order to listen...
In deep listening we listen with the
sole purpose of
helping the other person feel heard and accepted."
-- Thich Nhat Hanh
"Healing comes from our innate capacity for deep listening.
This deep
listening or seeing is not through our eyes or ears,
but through our
heart and soul."
-- Jack Kornfeld
There
is, perhaps, no more important form of meditative discipline than what Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh calls deep listening. It connects us to ourselves, to one another -- and to our true nature.
Our time on the cushion in formal meditation is essential. Yet, it is what happens next that really
matters. It is there, in the midst of our day-to-day lives, that
kindness, clarity, ease, and compassion are actualized -- or not.
Beans in our Ears
Most of us have learned the prevailing form of listening in our society. Much of the time we don't really listen. Rather than listen to connect deeply with the experience of another, we listen to reply. Rather than listen with undivided attention, we are often thinking of what we are going to say next.
Beans in our Ears
Most of us have learned the prevailing form of listening in our society. Much of the time we don't really listen. Rather than listen to connect deeply with the experience of another, we listen to reply. Rather than listen with undivided attention, we are often thinking of what we are going to say next.
Although
our ears and eyes and finer sensibilities are operational as we listen,
much of our attention is locked into our thoughts about what someone is saying.
As a matter of habit, we automatically analyze, compare, judge, often immediately relating it to an associated personal experience. On automatic pilot, we seek to advise, counsel, or otherwise react without a deep awareness of what is really going on -- either inside ourselves or the other person. As a result, whole realms of emotional and intuitive energies remain beneath the level of our awareness. Rather than really connect, we often end up bouncing of one another.
As a matter of habit, we automatically analyze, compare, judge, often immediately relating it to an associated personal experience. On automatic pilot, we seek to advise, counsel, or otherwise react without a deep awareness of what is really going on -- either inside ourselves or the other person. As a result, whole realms of emotional and intuitive energies remain beneath the level of our awareness. Rather than really connect, we often end up bouncing of one another.
It doesn't have to be this way.
We can actually learn an entirely different way of listening to another person -- and to ourselves! We can go deeper. We can empathize. We can listen with our hearts.
(READ MORE)
(READ MORE)
