― J. Krishnamurti
we open or close our minds right now.”
Growing up immersed in a society that is highly judgmental, most of us have been deeply conditioned to experience our lives in terms of good/bad, right/wrong, should be/shouldn't be.
"Mindfulness and Meditation allow us to open our hearts, relax our bodies, and clear our minds enough to experience the vast, mysterious, sacred reality of life directly. With Practice we come to know for ourselves that eternity is available in each moment.
Sometimes
the magic happens when you are meditating with others. In the silence, the illusion of our fundamental separateness evaporates. The "I"
becomes "we" -- and we know it.
I think it's even sweeter when it happens that way.
I remember one of those times distinctly. Sitting here now, it seems like it happened in a different world, a long, long time ago. I guess it was. The year was 6 B.C. Six years Before COVID.
There
were fifteen of us gathered to Simply Sit Still during the Wednesday Evening Mindfulness Circle at
the Recovery Learning Community's Greenfield Center that night. As was our Practice, I rang the bell three times and we sat in silent meditation for twenty minutes.
At a certain point, it happened. It got really quiet. Really, Really -- Quiet!
In the silence, a Presence emerged.
When
I rang the bell to end the meditation and begin the Heart Council, the
air was electric. I knew that what I had just experienced wasn't just a
subjective personal event occurring within the confines of my own
skull. I could see it in
people's eyes.
As we went around the Circle to compare notes on what we had each experienced during our meditation, the first person exclaimed, wide-eyed, "you could actually hear the silence!"
"Yes. The Silence was deafening!" a second added. Others nodded.
The magic had occurred. In the silence, what my first Zen teacher called the Soundless Sound had emerged as a shared experience. Whenever that happens, even for a few moments, our Essential Oneness within the embrace of the One Love becomes less theoretical. Reality Asserts Itself. You can feel it in your bones. In the stillness our shared silence, we know:
We are not only in this together -- we are this together!
I love it when that happens.
And yet...
Scurrying Through the Matrix
In a society that places a high value on individualism, competition, speed, achievement, and acquisition, Simply Sitting Still can be challenging. We have been conditioned to experience our world through mental and emotional states that manifest a lot of mental activity, a feeling of restless motion -- and, whether we are aware of it or not, a profound sense of separation.
As the profit motive and the technology of late stage capitalism increasingly captures and commodifies our attention, it's only gotten worse. With the proliferation of cellphones and video screens, We are bombarded with incessant visual and auditory stimulation. Our minds are habitually filled with incessant noise and chatter -- inner and outer.
In today's world, most of us have spent much of our lives being constantly distracted and disconnected from our True Nature.
The direct experience of what Thich Nhat Hanh calls Interbeing,
our fundamental interconnection with one another and the entire Web of
Life , is rarely encountered on a conscious level. Yet it is always
there -- always here, more correctly -- in the embrace of what contemporary spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle and others have called the Eternal Now.
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In fact, there were times
in my life that I had spiraled down into deep depression, anxiety, and total burn-out.
That was then. This is now.
This
morning, like most mornings these days, I brushed my teeth, washed my face. took a deep breath, and felt my heart. Then, with compassion and curiosity, I looked my mirror image straight in the eye for a moment or two. Then, I
wobbled over to the altar in my bedroom. There, I spent a few moments in a sequence of ritual prayers and bows. Then, as I've done for decades, I bowed, lowered myself to the zafu and Simply Sat Still.
Within moments, it was different.
There in my little corner of
the world, with my body comfortable
and upright on the meditation cushion, with eyes open and unfocused, I floated on the breath of Practice. In the expansive gaze of Open Awareness, I relaxed and watched as ripples
of thought, feelings, and bodily sensations emerged and dissipated along
the surface of a clear, calm, vast pool of bright spacious awareness. Simply Sitting Still, no longer grasping or pushing away what I was experiencing, I breathed,
relaxed, softened, and opened.
Almost immediately, my heart and mind opened to the fact that a lot of old coots were feeling these same aches and pains and sadness. Deeply aware that bodily pain and the emotional clouds of doom and gloom are being experienced by countless other human beings, young and old, at that very moment, I relaxed and opened to our pain.
As I have learned to do in Tonglen Practice, I simply allowed painful bodily sensations and emotional energies to emerge and breathed them directly into my heart chakra. There, in my heart of hearts, the gracious spaciousness of the One Love that exists within and beyond all that is embraced my sincere aspirations for our collective freedom from suffering. In the Compassionate Presence that emerged, the dark ripples of painful energy began to dissipate and dissolve. I stayed with it. Soon, with each out breath, I was able to release my heartfelt aspirations as prayers for peace, liberation, and healing.
Over the years, I've found that sometimes tears will emerge as I practice Tonglen. I've learned to trust in the tears. They are actually a good thing. It is the body's natural response to the grief that is inherent in the human condition. Released, the tears wash away the hardness of heart that we've been taught to wear as a shield against the painful aspects of life. As tears flow, the heart opens. Sometimes gratitude, even joyous wonder, emerge as well. Love embraces it all.
At other times, when facing strong emotional energies, I've found that it's been wise to "back off" a bit. It can be overwhelming at times. Having been touched by the teachings of Pema Chodron, I've found that being gentle and patient with oneself is, perhaps, the most important quality of heart to bring to Practice. If need be, I'll focus my attention elsewhere for awhile. I'll zero in on the sights and sounds of the space I'm in, or a return to a tighter focus on my breath. Sometimes, I will turn to a mantra, metta recitations, or prayer. Sometimes, it's been time to just let go and take a walk.
Yet, this morning, I simply sat still breathing. Tonglen Practice emerged and, after a time, receded. Then I Simply Sat Still in open awareness again. Time danced with the Timeless, as the sounds of traffic ebbed and flowed outside the window.
The hour flew by. The bells on my iPhone rang. I recited the Four Bodhisattva Vows as I have done for decades -- and rose to face the day.
But, that was then, this is now.
Here I am, sitting at this old Mac Laptop watching letters and words tap dance across
the screen. Remembering to take a couple of deep breaths, I feel my heart and sit up a
bit straighter. I relax and come to my senses. Settling into a fuller awareness of the sights and
sounds and sensations and gracious spaciousness of Life as it emerges moment to moment, I relax and open. Words seem to just appear and find their way into my fingers. It's quite mysterious really. Being present, I feel a Presence. In the
midst of a wondrous, somewhat dreamlike beauty, Reality asserts itself. The sacred and
the ordinary dance hand in hand.
So, now what?