―
When
I growing up, being called a "space cadet" was not a
good thing. Unless you were an astronaut-in-training at NASA
(or, perhaps, a Trekkie), the term was a put-down. The folks who didn't
pay a lot of attention to the seemingly endless concerns and activities
of high school and college life? They just weren't "cool."
Although I didn't
realize it at the time, some of these space cadets were actually marching, perhaps even dancing, to the beat of a different drummer. In doing so, they had a leg up on the rest of us.
Why?
Our legs were fully engaged
spinning the hamster wheel of an invisible, but very captivating, mind
cage. Scrambling to conform to the rat race of the "real world," we couldn't afford to just space out.
Compelled by our thoughts and feelings about doing it right, going
for the
gold, being all we can be, etc.,
most of us were continually trying to get with the program presented to
us in a culture steeped in capitalism, scientific materialism, racism,
and the other "ism's" that serve to oppress the human spirit.
From
the time we woke up until the time we fell asleep, we were being
conditioned by the world around us to disregard the spiritual dimension
of life.
Sadly, most of us internalized the values and norms the mainstream society long before we had the experience or the skills to realize what was happening. We didn't see that our society's "conventional reality" was a house built on the ever-shifting sands of what the Buddhist call the eight worldly concerns.
Rather than taking the time to "consider the lilies" as Jesus had
counseled and explore the spiritual dimension of our lives, we became
increasingly fixated on the material and psychological "needs" presented
to us by the mass culture.
Some of us, like me, deeply wounded in childhood, were racing to escape the anathema of being called a "loser." So, "taking no anxious thought about tomorrow" never crossed our minds. Achieving, succeeding, and winning became everything.
The
space
cadet seemed not to take such things that seriously. It seemed that he or she could
frequently let go, relax -- and journey elsewhere.
Aboard the Starship Enterprise
These days, I will gladly accept the title of space cadet. I've found that space, what some folks call "inner space," is the final frontier. In
fact, as we voyage in the present moment to the precise edge of this
ever-unfolding frontier, we see that inner and outer space are merely
concepts, two sides of the same coin. And that coin is flipping
eternally though a boundless and infinite universe of awareness. In
this realm there is no winning or losing. The coin never lands.
Once
I got a taste of the boundless and infinitely forgiving space at the
heart of reality, I knew that I was all in. Although I've had some
crash landings and have encountered some space monsters along the way,
I'm grateful to have signed
on for the voyage. Most every morning, I choose to step off the hamster
wheel for at least an hour -- and go into free fall. I simply sit still
for about an an hour.
Some people call what I do meditation.
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Spending
time examining the nature of mind, I've seen directly that
there is a whole lot more to reality than meets the eye -- or at least
the two eyes we generally have been trained to use in the conventional
way. ( I won't get into a discussion of third eyes, ESP, and Visions
here. Spending a number of years exploring the Zen tradition has
predisposed me to not get too tangled up in psychic "powers" but...)
As Practice has deepened, it's become quite clear that there is a whole lot more space than there is solidity in the
nature of things. In fact, even what appears to be quite solid, when
looked into deeply, isn't.
Perceived directly in open awareness, what we conventionally call "things" aren't.
They are localized intersections in an infinite web of constantly flowing energy. With
Practice, they appear in radical clarity as momentary events sparkling like diamonds
within the
embrace of limitless space.
So, at this stage of the journey, I find that being a space cadet is often quite delightful. Immersed in the gracious spaciousness of open awareness, what had once seemed solid and fixed becomes more malleable. In the alchemy of Practice, the lead and dross
of the human condition become transmutable.
I've found that when I'm no longer mindlessly reacting to the world, the heart opens and the mind clears. From that space, the
awesome task that Yogi Jesus and others proclaimed as sacred -- that of
loving your neighbor as yourself -- becomes increasingly doable. There
is a delight and joy that emerges that is not dependent on how things turn out.
In the embrace of an open heart and clear mind, all of reality glitters like gold.
The Voyage Continues
As Practice deepens, the quality of consciousness cultivated on the
meditation cushion deepens and persists. Over time, it embraces the activities of
daily
life, more and more. When this palpable sense of spaciousness is readily available, all sorts
of things shift.
These days, thoughts and feelings that used to dominate my
awareness and send me spinning into countless hours of stressful angst
at best, or an arsenal of painful and counterproductive behaviors at
worst, rarely do. Most of the time, it's been pretty smooth sailing. I can pretty much relax,
keep my eyes, ears, and heart relatively open, and do what needs to be done (or not done) from moment
to moment.
With Practice, mind states that used to attach
themselves to the illusory solidity of a "me" being right or being
wrong, being good or being bad, being worthy or unworthy, are
usually seen for what they are. They aren't fixed, solid, "truths." They are ephemeral and fleeting clouds
floating in the expanse of a clear, endless sky. I no longer believe everything I think.
As
a result, the
blame and self-blame that had so often
arisen in the past usually don't seem to form. Even if they do, for the
most part, these, too, are experienced as fleeting thoughts and
feelings. Experience has taught me that they quickly
dissipate. These days,
what would have become long, angry, arguments or hours of debilitating
self-talk don't readily emerge. The old conditioned patterns may
emerge, but usually they can't get any traction.
Life being life, at times I still encounter stormy seas. Sometimes,
the thunder and lightning emerges from my own ancient wounds. Yet,
thankfully, I'm no longer as prone to rocking my own boat to make
matters worse. So, I'm generally able to readily return to the present
moment and navigate my activities and relationships with greater grace,
ease., and skill.
When it becomes obvious that even
my best efforts haven't calmed the waters, there is generally enough
ambient
spaciousness to see and accept that more readily. I can usually take a
deep breath or two, relax, and just float along for a bit. Sometimes,
something then occurs to me, and I can trim the sails, and explore a
different tack. Sometimes, I see that I need to just turn around and
sail away
with the wind at my back.
It's often just that simple.
As the heart opens to the clear sky of Mindful Awareness, I've come to see that there is a warmth that radiates through the cool, crisp gracious spaciousness as well.
The Sun is always
shining. It's luminosity and warmth are present even on a cloudy day.
The One Love that is the source and destination of the journey is
omnipresent.
But, don't take my word for it. See for yourself.
It just takes Practice.
Originally Published as "Sacred Space," December 6, 2014
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